The Wife/ Mom/ Woman Syndrome

Yes, I agree very much- What should we do with all this time on our hands?? I think it is especially true for women in general, and for me in particular. Men always have a mitzva to be learning... and women? Well, there's the husband and the kids, shopping, cleaning, cooking, laundry... it never ends. For many women, especially in Israel, it's challenging enough to keep up with all this.
(Adding in a couple of shiurim, some shidduch work- not sure what else they do! Neshei projects?!)

But. Truthfully, keeping house does not have to be so over-whelming- it certainly is not for me!
Not a full-time job, and not 100% fulfilling either.

So what to do with:

a. brains in our heads

b. feet in our shoes

c. time on our hands!!!

the Cossacks

Hi Daughter

my thoughts on the subject go something like this....

We have too much leisure time on our hands. This goes without saying. In the 'heim' there was a lot of abject poverty. The husband was scratching around for work or trying to fulfill the complement due the 'porutz'. The wife was milking the cow and cleaning the house and looking after the kids, etc (she always has more to do...).

They were both trying to avoid the next marauding cossack and therefore she was relieved to have a live husband with all limbs intact at the end of the day. No time for speculation over here....I should have married the other guy/girl is one of the most oft-quoted or thought catch-phrases of the 20/21 century....

Generally, Big Mistake....

Firstly, who knows, might be the same or a lot worse.

Secondly, the change entails enormous baggage (especially if there are kids involved).

Thirdly, G-d chose for me. Don't interfere with the plot unless you have extremely good cause to do so.

More on this another time.

Catch you later.

Luv

Abba

Thank you and Yes!

Abbs
Thank you
No it was not terrible at all! I always love listening to you! I miss reading your Fortune and Time magazine- after you have opened it- of course!
There are definitely up's and down's.. I know that's how it goes.. But when I'm down- I'm very down, when I'm up- I'm very up and when I'm bad- I'm horrid!
Yes, you can definitely help... as always. I find it hard to talk sometimes- writing comes easier.
You've told me before that you used to get depressed on Mondays. How?! In my mind, you are the busiest, most accomplished man I know! You never stop going 'veiter', I find it hard to imagine a depressed Abba.
Have a good Shabbos and thank you.
I love you
Love Me

From Abba

Hi
This from my last Fortune magazine:
'Last summer Wanda Ferragamo ordered a special gift for her 22 grandchildren and 23 great-grandchildren. The fashion-family matriarch took a plastic Weeble, the egg-shaped doll that wobbles but doesn't fall down, and had it recast as foot-tall artisinal silver statues. Hand soldered lace curled around 45 bellies. "My Dears", read the inscribed dedication, "regain your balance and cntinue straight on the path of principles and moral rectitude shown to you."

She's quiet a lady, Italian 80-year old woman who took over her husband's shoe business when he died in 1960 and built it into a multi-million dollar company.

I don't have to tell you how silly this is. I want to be able to have a dialog with you rather. Can I communicate by email? I would like to send you something every day and you reply...might even turn into a best-seller.

I don't have to tell you this (or do I?). Life is not exciting every day. Mondays are especially bad, maybe Sunday in Israel. Slowly, after years of practice, my Mondays are not as bad anymore. It's like the first ten of 30 push-ups. You resolve to weather it is based on the knowledge that a) It gets better as the week goes by, and b) it's only the first 80 or 90 years that are tough ( as Zaida used to say). It has its up moments and then down ones. Read somewhere that these are called y'mei sina and y'mei ahava, and that we grow more during y'mei sina. Makes sense, I think I'm beginning to feel it's a bit true.

The medrash says that the nachash was on a very high madrega (stood erect, spoke to Hashem) and desired Chava, which was inappropriate, therefore, he never gained what he desired and also lost what he had. I suppose they can be all up-days if you have access to powerful narcotics. It lasts as long as you have the money, aren't yet in jail and are still breathing. And- I just remembered this one by Erma Bombeck (tell you about her another time) "don't confuse fame with success; Madonna is one, Hellen Keller is the other."

So is all of this really terrible? Some of it? Which part? I love you very much and would love to help you somehow; can I? I really like communicating with you, does this work? Hoping yes and to hear from you soon,

Luv

Your Abba